WARNING! This Blog Contains; Personal Opinion, Parody, Humour, Satire, Sarcasm, Criticism, Incredulity, Contempt, Indignation and/or Expletives. It also Contains a Huge Number of Rather Surprising Facts About the Oddly Dysfunctional Nature of Harper Land.

CHECK BACK OFTEN ~ ALL POSTS are Updated As New Information Becomes Available.

March 04, 2011

So, now it's "The Harper Government" Oh CRAP!

.Prima Donna ~ Lena Sotskova, artist

Our Prime Minister is a Prima Donna. Not in the Classical sense, I suppose, but a Prima Donna none the less. Vanity may not be his only fault, but it certainly is very near the top of that very long list of qualities that make him such a questionable leader. Narcissus has nothing on our Mr. Harper. From  his labour intensive hair to his 'oh so soft' hands, He is no more the image of a leader than he is a leader. He is a man of illusions, and not a man of real substance.

To illustrate this I want to examine his fascination with his own image, and his oddly delusional belief that his image is dear to all Canadians and that it fills us with pride.

I am not sure where to start here, as there are so many examples of Harper offering form where substance was required.

Waving to the crowd totally oblivious to the
amount of coverage that it was going to get,
 and that it still gets more than 5 years later.
"They are gonna love this!"
I know! Let's start with the fantasy that he shared with us back in 2005 when, while in Calgary at the Stampede, he quite sadly  donned a far too tight-fitting leather cowboy outfit and had his picture taken as he posed seemingly comfortably in the style of a 1920s silent film star.
That really is the only way I can describe it, but it continues to gain attention some five years later. The latest version (there surely will be more to come, I am quite sure) was published yet again just yesterday by a very good friend of mine on the quickly growing and very educational Canadians Rallying to Unseat Stephen Harper Facebook page. The ill conceived picture was, and remains, a source of great embarrassment to the PMO. It also remains deliciously hilarious.
And then there was the famous Powder Blue Sweater-vest. I won't dwell on it though, Just this short blog that was easy to find as most of us are already familiar with the effect it had on Canadians. Literally hundreds of stories have been written about it but it would be hard to say that any have been quite so poignantly and sincerely appreciative of it's glory than Canada's own Marg Delahunty.

Lets move on to the Harper Photo Gallery within the confines of the House of Commons. Unbelievable as it sounds, Stephen Harper has filled the exclusive government lobby of the House of Commons with an amazing number of portraits of himself. Of course the public is not actually invited. No one gets to bask in the glow of  the portraits of "such an important man" as Mr. Harper without a Conservative party membership, enough security clearance and a keen sense of the absurd.

I have often felt that I would love to know how those few lucky people who do get to see them, actually feel about the unusual experience.

Luckily, back in early 2008, a couple of unlikely Canadians got to see these amazing images of the Cult of Stephen Harper, when Green party leader Elizabeth May and then Macleans.ca blogger Kady O'Malley got to play tourists in the presence of this shrine of our very own Narcissus. They shared their impressions on line:

" Elizabeth May and Kady O'Malley were surprised and a bit speechless when they saw the exhibit recently as guest Commons Speakers during a youth Parliament.<> "When you walk in the door, all you see are pictures of Stephen Harper," said Ms. May. "I'd say between every window, in every available space of the wall, at eye level, every available space has a photo of Stephen Harper."               
"You've got photos of Stephen Harper, but not of previous prime ministers," she added. "Photos of Stephen Harper in different costumes, in different settings, dressed as a fireman, in Hudson Bay looking for polar bears, meeting the Dalai Lama, even the portrait of the Queen had to have Stephen Harper, but in a candid, behind her." 

Harper Chastises Americans for saying
that the Economy was in danger.
 This is his famous "Recession?
What Recession? Moment
Moving 'Right' along, I want to share with you what I consider Stephen Harper's finest Moment in the "Imaginary Harper" game.

It also contributed a photograph that I consider a milestone and a highpoint in his quest for the perfect image of  a perfect Leader. This photograph presents the image of a confident, trustworthy, accomplished, man with superior knowledge of Economics and his hand firmly upon the rudder that controls that Economy.

And that Perfect Image, in my opinion, was clearly achieved the night, just before the 2008 election, when he Chastised Americans for even suggesting that Canada's economy was at risk. A claim, by the way that his Opponent, Stephan Dion was supporting.

But of course, as more of us are coming to realise, the Masterful Image of a Confident Stephen Harper assuring us that there would be no Global meltdown in the Economy in the face of all the then mounting evidence to the Contrary, was an illusion. It was in fact a Lie in the Order of "Weapons of Mass Destruction" ( a lie he also upheld by the way.)

He is an Illusionist of Considerable skill, but sadly, Just an Illusion.

It has come to my attention that to this day Stephen Harper insists that his Cult of Personality is alive and well and living in Canada within the Hearts and minds of many. The best illustration of Harper's clinging to this illusion, or delusion that he is beloved by many, as it were, is that he is in the habit of mailing out unsolicited 8 x 10 Glossy 'Autographed' photographs of  himself (suitable for hanging) to some of  those who contribute to his parties coffers. I can only imagine the joy that must accompany such a wonderful gift lol. 

A mysterious Envelope:
With one of those labels from the Cheque Republic on it?

Oh My God! Oh My God! Oh My God! Oh My God! Oh My God!  My God! .... It Must be one of those .....
        Great Big Cheques!

And Look! It's got my name on it! And there is a letter. This is exciting!          
A Photograph of Steven Harper? WTF?
And it comes Complete with Lies about Michael Ignatieff?

Oh Look an 8 x 10 glossy Photo
of the man who Wanted me to hear those LIES about
Michael Ignatieff!

A Glossy Photograph of a
Glossy Man who is just an Illusion,
is Just Another Glossy Thing
it's Just Another

So, if you read all of this and are still interested, let me know how you feel about Stephen Harper and what you would do with a Photograph of him! I will try to get back to those of you who do have an opinion. 

I started a discussion that you can still join on the C.R.U.S.H. SITE @ this address.

Personally, like the Cowboy outfit, the Blue sweater vest, the fact that he feels that a Museum to his image is what is needed within the Halls of the House of Commons, I find Stephen Harper's Attempts at establishing a Culture of Personality hilarious beyond belief.

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